Why did the robot cross the road? Because he was carbon bonded to the chicken
What do you call a french man wearing slippers? Philipe Philop
A man walks into his local butchers and bets the butcher £50 th@ he can´t reach either of the pieces of meat of the top shelf. The butcher says ´no i cant do that, the steaks are too high!´
The worst disaster in the history of Ireland occured last night in belfast. A two seater aeroplane came down in stormy weather and crash landed on a grave yard. So far the Irish authorities have found 80 bodies and they expect the number to rise as the search carrys on.
2 ships were traveling across the atlantic, one from England and one from USA. The one from America was transporting blue paint, wheras the one from England was carrying red paint. The ships collided with each other and the crew of both the ships were marooned.
A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four.
Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return.
This time the husband crosses his fingers and says Mirror mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!.
Again, theres a bright flash... and then his legs fall off!
Top 10 things NOT to say to parents when picking up a date.
10. Sorry Im a little late. I had to stop by the drugstore.
9. Show me how you used to spank her.
8. Please come inside? Wow, you sound just like your daughter.
7. Do you think she would put out if I told her that I loved her?
6. I just got my license today.
5. I believe being sexually active since I was 12 has helped me mature.
4. Five bucks says shes a D-cup.
3. Hey do you have an empty pop can and some matches?
2.Hi. Im Robert, but my friends call me Back Door Bob.
1. So, does your wife just lay there during sex too?
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