Gay men have taken the internet by storm, and when it comes to finding a partner, we’re not exactly at the back of the queue. They say it pays to advertise, and gay men aren’t at all shy when it comes to touting their wares.
However, some gay boys should pay more attention to the `Trades Descriptions Act` when it comes to flogging their charms.
To help cut through the chuff of personal ads, we’ve knocked up a little guide of our very own.
1. 30-ish
...49
2.Active
...Bad hips
3.Adventurous
...Fister
4.Athletic
...Small penis
5. Average-looking
...Face like a smacked arse
6. Beautiful
...Lady boy
7. Bisexual
…Still sober
8. Boy Next Door
…Still lives with his mother
9. Confident
...Mouthy
10. Contagious smile
...Does a lot of ecstasy
11. Down-to-earth
...Foreskin hygiene problems
12. Educated
...Needs spanking
13. Emotionally secure
...Medicated
14. Experienced
…Knackered
15. Free spirit
...Junkie
16. Friendship first
...Still taking the antibiotics
17. Fun
...Annoying
18. Gentle
...Comatose
19. Genuine
...Dull
20. Good listener
...Borderline autistic
21. Good sense of humour
…Ugly
22. Hairy
…Back, nose and arse.
23. Intelligent
...Ponce
24. Lively
…Has crabs
25. Looking for older
…Rent
26. Non-Scene
…Ex Rent
27. Old-fashioned
...Expects you to call him Daddy
28. Open-minded
...Gimp
29. Outgoing
...Loud and embarrassing
30. Passionate
...Slobbers
31. Professional
...Cross dresser
32. Redhead
...Red Pubes
33. Rugby Build
...Fat
34. Romantic
...Looks better by candlelight
35. Shy
…Funny body
36. Sincere
...Crap shag
37. Slim
…Jail bait
38. Smooth
…Bald
39. Social
...More pricks than a dartboard
40. Sporty
…Keeps his socks on
41. Straight Acting
…Screaming queen
42. Swimmers Build
…Bony arse
43. Toned
…Lumpy
44. Uniformed
…Traffic Warden
45. Wants soul mate
...Stalker
46. Well Endowed
...Slut
47. Young at heart
...Droopy testicles
