Suraj Hua Madham , chand bhi chalne laga,
mein thehra raha, zameen chalne lagi, sajna kya yehi pyaar hai ??
Nalayak, yeh pyar nahi EARTHQUAKE hai ! BHAAG ......
>> Kabhi jab tumhara H1 expire ho
>> Green card renewal ka tension shuru ho
>> Tab tum mere paas aana mere dost
>> Mera ghar khula hai khula hi rahega
>> Tumhare liye ||
>>
>> Abhi tumko meri zarurat nahin
>> Bahot bodyshoppers mil jayenge
>> Abhi Y2K ka ek saagar hai USA
>> Jobs jitane chahoge mil jayenge
>>
>> Yeh bodyshoppers tumhe jab satane lage
>> Year 2000 ke problems khatam hone lage
>> Tab tum mere paas aana mere dost
>> Mera ghar khula hai khula hi rahega
>> Tumhare liye ||
>>
>> Tum young ho, nadaan ho, ambitious ho
>> West is the best mein believe karte ho
>> Pata hai ki tumhe mujhase bahut pyar hai
>> Per paisa kamane ki yehi umra hai
>>
>> Prejudice se jab tum tang aane lage
>> Tumhara junior jab tumhara boss bane
>> Tab tum mere paas aana mere dost
>> Mera ghar khula hai khula hi rahega
>> Tumhare liye ||
>>
>> Biwi-bachche to pahale khush hi honge
>> Dishwasher aur microwave ka kamal hai ye
>> Shopping or sightseeing ki enjoyment hongi
>> Heaven on earth ki feeling karib hongi
>>
>> Bahchche jab dating ki shuruat kare
>> Aur biwi Honda chodke Benz maangane lage
>> Tab tum mere paas aana mere dost
>> Mera ghar khula hai khula hi rahega
>> Tumhare liye ||
Amitabh - Han han mein chor hun, mein bazar mein kaladhandha karta hun,
police ke record mein mera naam hai. Lekin mein akela nahin hun. Jao pahle
ush admi ko msg de kar aao jisne mera baap ko chor kaha tha; Jao pahle ush
admi ko msg de kar aao jisne meri maa ko gali deke naukri se nikal diya
tha; jao pahle ush aadmi ko msg de kar aao jisne mere haath me yeh likh
diya tha; Uske BAAD, Uske baad mere bhai tum jab chahoge tab mere m/c
mein msg de dena.
Dharmendra - Kutte Kaminey, Agar tuune apni maa ki doodh piya hai to
message chodde, warana mein tujhe jinda nahin chodunga.
AJIT's voicemail - Sari duniya mujhe white LION ke naamse janti hai,
jabtak tum messages chhodoge hum bharat se bahut dur ja chuke honge,
robert helicopter chalu karo !!
Ajit : "Smart move". Phone kiya aapne baaahot aaachha kiya Apka nam chod
dijiye aur Mona apka phone louta degi ! Please Hiron ki aawaj sunte hi
record karna !
Shatru : jis haram-zade ne call kiya hain ... mein us haram-zade ko zinda
nahi chodunga... jaan se maar dunga
Shatru - AAahoy ! Ye Chenu ka answering m/c hai ! Seedhi taraha se message
chhod de warna mai teri haddi pasli ek kardunga, ! haaa
Shatru - Apne Mangal ko phone kiya hai, koi phate hue tash ke tirpanve
patte ko nahin ! Nam chod dena Ham patta khud jaan lenge !
Raj Kumar : Jaani. Shisheke gharome rahane wale pathar nahi pheka
karate.Tum pathar mat pheko message chodo. Hum jara jaldi me hai.
Jaani yeh answering machine koi bacchon ka khel nahi. hum ko mita sake woh
tumahre msg mein dum nahi.... hum se hain ye m/c .. m/c se hum nahi....
Pran - PATHAN ki ansering m/c.... HUM tereku bola msg chod de warna hum
pathan ka baccha tumara tangdi tod dega
Prem chopra - hum woh hain jo shishe ko patthar se katate hain.... aaapke
msg ki iit ka jawab patthar se denge.... BTW: Mera Naam hai Pre'm, He he
Pre'm Chopra
KESTO - Ihhhiyaa ! saale message Chhod ! nahi to Batli de !! Ihhhiyaa!
Jaldi kar HICH ! Apun ko janeka hai Ihhhiyaa ! ! hick! aay . hick! ye
ansering hick! machine hick! msg ..
Asrani - AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHAAAA ! Phone kiya ! Tune phone kiya RRRRREEEEEE!
Message rakh ! AAAAAAAAHHHHAAAAA !
Asrani -- adhe log 1 press karo.. adhe log 2 press karo... baki msg
rakho.hum angrezon ke zamane ke jailar hain hA HAAAAAAA.. msg angrezimein
rakho.. HA HAAAAAAA
BINDU - Mera nam hai shabnam, pyar se log mujhe SHABBO kehate
hai...Tumhara naan kya hai !! Tina Mina, Anju, Manju Yaaa Madhuuu.
Shakti - aaauu lalita, Message chhod deee ! warna teri maa ki jaaan
....Aaaauu lalita !! mera naam Balma... badriparsad lalanparsad
malapani... balma..Pyarasa... Nanhasa.. Chotasa ....Balmaa. Aur mere kane
Chaku hai?
>> 1) Ek Sher sunaata hoon bade dhyan se suno
>> Mujhe sher nahi aata kisi aur se suno.
>>
>> 2) Badli hai duniya , kuchch mein bhi badal gaya hoon
>> Pahle trainee tha ab S/W Engr ho gaya hoon
>>
>> 3) VC aaye to VB mein, VB aaye to VC mein daal do
>> seedhe seedhe sabko museebat mein daal do
>>
>> 4) Project extend ho gaya to kya ho jaata hai?
>> Are Tankha milti hai aur time pass hota hai.
>>
>> 5) Cheekh Cheekh ke mera gala baith gaya
>> tab jaa ke VB4 manual ka xerox ban gaya
>>
>> 6) Ghayal hai scanner mera , koi dava to dila do
>> Kuch na sahi to bas ek mail - id dila do.
>>
>> 7) Kasam hai dosto tumhe apne apne mail-id ki
>> laga do in projects par baazi apne jaan ki
>>
>> 8) Is 8 mahino me yahan mujhe kuch nahin mila
>> Mail to kya ek visiting card bhi nahi mila.
>>
>> 9) Pyar to tum par mujhe bahut aata hai
>> Par kya karu Tera baap beech mein aata hai
>>
>> 10) Pyar ke sitaare jab gardish mein hote hai
>> Laila ghar mein aur majnoo jail mein hote hai
>>
>> 11) Shadi ke pahle - Maine pyar kiya
>> Shadi ke baad - Ye maine kya kiya
>>
>> 12) Bill submit karte karte hum to bor ho gaye
>> Kya karege yaaron hum to 'Bill'able ho gaye
>>
>> 13) Jab tak tu apne dil ki baat mujhe samjhayegi
>> meri shaadi kahin aur ho jayegi
>>
>> 14) Seedha to khada rah Hamesha hilta rahta hai
>> Kuch kaam bhi kar hamesha game khelta hai
>>
>> 15) Gadhe bhi aajkal samajhdaar ho gaye hain
>> use ke saath rah kar Ghode bhi gadhe ho gaye hain
>>
>> 16) Dum aadmi main nahin Cigarette mein hota hai
>> isiliye Cigarette aadmi ko nahin aadmi Cigarette ko peeta hai
>>
>> 17) Pyar mein kisine Dhoka to kisine kasam khayi hai
>> Hum wo majnoo hai jisne sirf laat khayi hai.
>>
>> 18) Unko mere pyar par Ghussa aata hai
>> aur mujhe unke Ghusse par pyar aata hai.
Pehla Pagal : Ager tum batao kay is Box mein kia hai tu ye anday tumhara aur ager tum ye bata du kay ye kitnay anday hain tu 5 kay 5 tumharay aur ager tum ye bata dogay ye kis kay anday hain tu wo morgi bhi tumhari.
Dosra Pagal : Yaar koi hint tu du.....
After Finishing MBBS, Dr. Munna Starts his practice. He Chcked 1st patient eyes, tongue & ears by TORCh & finally said BOLE TO.......... TORCH THEEEEK HAI
Once upon a time A woman gives birth to her 8th child. When her husband comes to see the baby, he is very surprised and taken aback as all his previous seven children were very fair while this one was very dark.
He says to his wife, "Tum sach sach bolo, main tumhe kuch nahin kahunga. Yeh kiska bachcha hai?"
The wife replied, "Kasam se! Yehi to tumhara bachcha hai!"
Ladka: Janeman is dil mein aaja. Ladki: Sandal nikalu kya? Ladka: Pagli mandir thodi hi hai, aise hi aaja!!
Ek baccha bus mein bus driver ki peeche vaali seat mein betha aur apnay aap sey bolna shuru hogaya:
"agar mera baap billi aur ma chipkali hoti to mein ek half lizard half billi hota".
bus driver ne pehelay ussay bardaasht kiya.
baccha dobara bola: "agar meri maa dinosaur aur baap choonti hota to mein half choonti half dinosaur hota."
iss tarha baccha bolta gaya , bolta gaya.
yahaan tak ke bus driver ney bus rok dee aur bacchay se poocha:
"agar tera baap ghunda hota aur maa nautanki hoti to phir tu kiya hota???
bachay ne javaab diya: BUS DRIVER
