-Big andy loses 70kg, but the leftover skin is so loose he's embarresed to go out. He's doctor said:'dont worry. Just pull the skin up over your head, put a hat on and come over. Andy does as he's told and makes it to the doctor office without incident. When he gets there the nurse ask', "say whats that hole in the middle of ur forehead?" Red faced andy replies "my navel, and what do u think of my tie?"
- cool: my grandma started walking 5miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we dont know where the hell she is!
-you should always give >100< percent at work.
12% monday, 23% tuesday, 40% wednesday, 20% thursday and 5% friday!
- "waiter, this chicken is just skin and bones!" 'but sir, do u want the feathers as well?'
-he came 2me 1nite...
Explored my body...
Licked, sucked, swallowed and has his fill...
Satisfied he left...
I was hurt...
Damn mosquito!
-some one misses u, needs u, worries about u, wants to be with u... But it aint me!
- Q: why did the turtle cross the road? A: to get to the shell station!
- Q:why can only 10% of women get into heaven? A: anymore and it would be hell!
- Bumper: eat well, stay fit, die anyway.
- Q:what do u call an eternity? a: four blondes in four cars at a four way stop.
-how do frogs die? They ker-mit suicide.
-sometimes i wake up grumpy. Other times i let her sleep.
-love me or leave me. Hey, where is everybody going?
-u got style, u got se x-appeal, u got the intelligence and u sure got the body, wait. Sorry, wrong number!
-handsome, sweet, intelligent, spontaneous,good looking, nice friends, charming, funny, well... Enough about ME! how about you?
