´I´ve bought a new clock,´ boasted Clancy. ´It goes eight days without winding.´
´How long does it go if you do wind it?´ asked the barman.
The drunk rang Dublin airport and inquired: ´How long does it take to fly to New York from Dublin?´
´Just a second,´ said the receptionist.
Thank you,´ said the drunk and replaced the phone.
´Wasn´t it tragic about my brother Michael,´ moaned Kelly. ´Women and whiskey killed him.´
´Is that so?´ sympathised OToole.
´Yes, he couldn´t get either so he hung himself!´
´Have you decided what to buy your missus for Christmas?´ asked McPhee.
´Sure, she decided it for me,´ answered Kelly. ´She said she wanted something with diamonds in it. So I´ve bought her a pack of cards!´
