In the course of my alcohol fuelled research into the terrible plans of the dark and insidious goats, i have come across a devious cunning plan formulated by these devious and cunning creatures that is at once both so devious and so cunning that it takes my breath away with the very scale of its deviousness and cunningnessness.
This fiendish plot revolves around goatish efforts to brainwash generations of children in the north east of england into worshipping goats in an attempt to create an army of hypnotised slaves. The time honoured folk rhyme ´´thou shall have a fishy´´ is in fact a devious word play designed by goats to override the will of humans.
Is it merely coincidence that the phrase ´´thou shall have a fishy´´ uncannily tallies with a phrase in the language of goats which equates to ´´why-aye! thou art born of goat and now thou art slave of goat and that´´ while the line ´´on a little dishy´´ translates roughly as ´´the goat is your friend, jimmythehoover is your enemy, wear shellsuits and all will make sense and eat lots of cheese for behold, it is good´´
Arise, fair children of the north east! Arise, oh humble geordies, and shake off the yoke of slavery imposed upon thee by the infernal goat! Arise, and find ye art strong and stuff!
